You do not understand the background of the elements of Leviticus. If you want to understand anything, you need to know how you got there, and where you went from there.
Your understanding even of the elements is indeed flawed. However, it is not necessary for you to understand how your conception of the elements is flawed, because they are no longer relevant.
You contest that they are relevant, because ignoring them is like being buddies with Hitler at a later stage. This is not the case. While homosexuality, as an example, is reprehensible under both Covenants, the Old and New Covenants are categorically different in their treatment of sin. This is the point that you are missing entirely.
Homosexuality is just one of a myriad of sins that merited death under the Old Covenant. Under the New Covenant, however, those sins are no longer subject to immediate capital punishment. This is because the Old Covenant was not only spiritual, but also civil law -- it was the sum totum of law in the nation of Israel. The New Covenant is solely spiritual. Civil authorities will deal with criminal punishment as they see fit.
Since Christians do not have a commission to go out and create the law of the land, it behooves us to live at peace with our neighbors, whether we find their actions to be reprehensible or not. The New Covenant does not address civil matters.
Now on to your objections about "wishy-washy"-ness on the part of God, and His supposed evil-ness. Any sin -- ANY sin -- is worthy of immediate death and eternal damnation. This, obviously, includes homosexuality, murder, rape, theft, greed, lust, lying, pride, (and the list goes on). Saying that all sins are worthy of damnation is not to state that there are not degrees of sin, but that's another discussion entirely. That any sin is worthy of damnation is true under both covenants.
The Old Covenant is rather more immediate in its administration of temporal punishment. Again, this is because it is written as the moral code AND civil law of the nation of Israel. The Old Covenant does not make allowances for repentance. The New Covenant, since it is written under grace, does not dispense temporal punishment on sinners. Instead, believers (and unbelievers) are given the chance to confess and repent, whereupon their sins, no matter how massive, will be forgiven.
Therefore, saying that God is evil because He condemns a certain sin to death is laughable. All sins, great or small, are worthy of death. The only way out is to perfectly conform to the moral code laid out in the Ten Commandments, and all the ramifications and derivatives from the Ten Commandments. This, as I'm sure you'll find, is completely impossible. God does not deal in half-measures. The only possible way is to have a perfect atonement for the sin you have committed. This atonement comes in the form of Jesus, who conformed perfectly to the moral code and civil law, and then sacrificed himself for all who believe. At the same time, the New Covenant was formed, placing men (mankind) under Grace, instead of under the law. The law was satisfied by the life and death of Jesus.
This is, I am sure, quite alien to your way of thought. But the crux of the matter is: There is right. And there is wrong. And, postulating an omnipotent being, who are we to say He is wrong? Should we not, given the chance at salvation, instead thank Him?