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Quitting Smoking

F

FireSoul

Wanderer
Anti-Basic;645348 said:
yes, but it most likely make me want to die anyway.
Click to expand...

AB, listen up. I don't know exactly what's going on with your brain, but I think I know the fear you're feeling. It's a seriously scary thing to not be able to think straight. To have to live with the screaming white noise that is the chaos in your head. It's made worse because most people out there have no fucking clue just how terrifying and frustrating that can really be. They get mad at you because you're not paying attention to them, it never occurs to them that you CAN'T. They have not experienced years of being told that they're stupid, or lazy, or not adequately motivated. I'm none of those things. But I've heard it all of my life. Believe me I totally understand choosing the path that may kill you...just so you can have a moment or two of normalcy and acceptance. I get that. I've never thought life was about quantity, I'd rather have quality. Something I've not had that much of. I have no idea how I'm going to adjust, or if I will. I feel sometimes like quitting is going to mean losing myself. I don't expect anyone to understand how much that scares me. I'm not sure they can.

People seem to have trouble accepting what they have no experience with. Or what they can't imagine. All I can say is this has nothing to do with being a coward, or a baby, and it's not lack of motivation. It's certainly not lack of willpower. Anyway I personally can't put it off any longer, so I'll not be around for a bit until I'm feeling better. AB don't start, find an alternative. Whatever it is. Talk to your Docs, MAKE them listen to you. You don't want to end up sick. Trust me it SUCKS.

Anyway good luck AB (and everyone else). Give me a couple of weeks...and I'll be back.

And AB, if you've started smoking I WILL beat you, and trust me, you won't like it.
 
TMSTKSBK

TMSTKSBK

Lord
Migraines are fun. If it's a bad one, I can tell which side of the brain it's on, because that half of my body goes numb. Literally the entire half, right down the center. S'scary...

And yeah...no smoking, AB. You won't have any money.
 
F

FireSoul

Wanderer
TMSTKSBK;645741 said:
Migraines are fun. If it's a bad one, I can tell which side of the brain it's on, because that half of my body goes numb. Literally the entire half, right down the center. S'scary...

And yeah...no smoking, AB. You won't have any money.
Click to expand...

When I was having mine, I'd go blind. Not fun. I was lucky mine were being caused by the pill. I stopped taking it and they stopped. Do they know what causes yours?
 
TMSTKSBK

TMSTKSBK

Lord
Stress and aspartame. And yeah, I have migraine w/aura, also >_<. Or do you mean literally blind...? For me it's a sort of area you can't see through...you have to look at things indirectly. I generally find a dark, quiet place and keep my eyes shut for the half-hour it takes to go away...

Also, vomiting repeatedly when there's nothing to vomit is always fun...I've always had trouble keeping the anti-migraine pills *down*...

A long time ago I was prescribed Vicodin to kill off the pain. It works pretty well if I get it down within like...two minutes of onset.
 
F

FireSoul

Wanderer
TMSTKSBK;645744 said:
Stress and aspartame. And yeah, I have migraine w/aura, also >_<. Or do you mean literally blind...? For me it's a sort of area you can't see through...you have to look at things indirectly. I generally find a dark, quiet place and keep my eyes shut for the half-hour it takes to go away...
Click to expand...

I used to get auras just before the pain started, but yeah I mean literally...no sight at all. It would last about 24 hours. They tried medication, did not work. So I'd just get my butt to the hospital as soon as the auras started and they would sedate me for the duration. I figured it was the pills, but my Doc kept saying no. Finally after nearly 2 years they sent me to a neurologist. Guess what his first question was? ARG!.

I can't go near aspartame either. OR red wine
 
TMSTKSBK

TMSTKSBK

Lord
I'm not fond of wine, so I dunno about that one. Aspartame is sort of a tolerance level. Until I consume so much, I'm safe. After a certain point, though, the probability just gets higher and higher that I'm going to have a migraine...

Bleh. Aura is my least favorite part (most un-favorite part, really). I can deal with the pain, the vomiting and the numbness...but losing my sight in such a weird way just freaks me out. The only real way I've found to deal with migraines is to just sleep it out. Go to sleep for five-six hours, and then hope it's subsiding when you wake up...
 
F

FireSoul

Wanderer
Yeah I hear ya. I'm very visual. Visual learner, artist. I don't think I'd do the whole permanently blind thing very well.
 
TMSTKSBK

TMSTKSBK

Lord
When I get them varies widely. The only real pattern is that they generally come in twos. I get one pretty bad one, and then another a few weeks later that is not quite as bad.
 
shrundowr

shrundowr

Lord
FireSoul;645738 said:
AB, listen up. I don't know exactly what's going on with your brain, but I think I know the fear you're feeling. It's a seriously scary thing to not be able to think straight. To have to live with the screaming white noise that is the chaos in your head. It's made worse because most people out there have no fucking clue just how terrifying and frustrating that can really be. They get mad at you because you're not paying attention to them, it never occurs to them that you CAN'T. They have not experienced years of being told that they're stupid, or lazy, or not adequately motivated. I'm none of those things. But I've heard it all of my life. Believe me I totally understand choosing the path that may kill you...just so you can have a moment or two of normalcy and acceptance. I get that. I've never thought life was about quantity, I'd rather have quality. Something I've not had that much of. I have no idea how I'm going to adjust, or if I will. I feel sometimes like quitting is going to mean losing myself. I don't expect anyone to understand how much that scares me. I'm not sure they can.

People seem to have trouble accepting what they have no experience with. Or what they can't imagine. All I can say is this has nothing to do with being a coward, or a baby, and it's not lack of motivation. It's certainly not lack of willpower. Anyway I personally can't put it off any longer, so I'll not be around for a bit until I'm feeling better. AB don't start, find an alternative. Whatever it is. Talk to your Docs, MAKE them listen to you. You don't want to end up sick. Trust me it SUCKS.

Anyway good luck AB (and everyone else). Give me a couple of weeks...and I'll be back.

And AB, if you've started smoking I WILL beat you, and trust me, you won't like it.
Click to expand...
Wow just saw this.

Yeah.... something tells me when you say you're gonna beat me, I will enjoy it regardless. :rolleyes: Rhexis learned that one already.


And I'm just gonna try it and see how I focus with it. You guys are acting like I've made a lifelong commitment to smoke the rest of my life already. I haven't. Just gonna try it and see how it does. And in any case, smoking for 4 years is a LOT healthier than what I do on a day to day basis, tbchwy.

oh and doctors all need to be shot. unless your a doctor who visit this forum in which case help me, or I will shoot you. XD.
 
HellRazor

HellRazor

Knight
I can tell you how it does!

It DOES addict you.
It DOES cause cancer.
It DOES make your hair and clothes stink.
It DOES eventually make you constantly cough up brown flem.
It DOES make you regret you ever started!

Sorry, AB, but...but it just DOES!!

:)
 
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